A message on I Corinthians 13:4 by Curtis Bostic

INTRODUCTION

December 1775 a letter containing British intelligence is intercepted by American patriots. It tells of an impending British invasion of Charlestowne, South Carolina.

To prepare for the British attack, Col. Moultrie and his Regiment arrive on Sullivan’s Island in March, 1776. Their plan: construct a fortified defense to protect the  harbor. But time is short and there are few resources. With no other choice, they hastily begin the process of creating log fortifications from the thousands of spongy palmetto trees which are abundant and close at hand.

Despite the American’s best efforts, the fort remains unfinished when on June 1^st the British first appear in the harbor. The half completed fort constructed of flimsy palmetto logs presented an unimpressive sight. The British were thrilled; they can blast the ragtag fort apart in minutes.

And they aren’t the only ones wholly unimpressed with the fort. The American General- General Lee arrived at the fort shortly before the fight began.

Moultrie wrote: “… when he [Lee] came to Sullivan’s Island, he called it a ‘slaughter pen,’ and wished to give up the post.” But Moultrie insisted he would hold the fort.

The British continue their advance and the night before the battle, word was circulated through the British fleet that “no quarter would be given the Americans.” 

The battle is about to begin. On one side is the British armada with a fleet of nine mighty men-of-war bristling with 300 heavy guns. On the other stands the flimsy-looking palmetto log fort of the Americans with 31 cannons.

At 11:30, a powerful broadside erupts from the closest ships. Describing the bombardment that followed, Lee wrote: “ it was the most furious and incessant fire I ever saw or heard.”  In fact, multiple witnesses to the event all told how on one occasion, 3 or 4 men- of- war simultaneously unloaded broadsides striking the makeshift barricade in concert and causing a massive tremor down the entire fort.

The shelling lasted nearly 10 hours. The British reportedly fired 17 tons of gun powder and landed over 1,200 shots into and around the fort, many of them 13” cannon balls.

THREE WORDS

“Love is patient.” Now the most common English translation of  I Corinthians 13:4.

Indeed, these three words have found their way into greeting cards, wall decorations, common parlance, and even our memories.

Words we often read with an understanding that is…shallow. It is as if they were plucked from a hallmark card.

1. LOVE

For starters, this word, “love,” is “agape.” Paul is not speaking about love in general or love as mere affection. In the Greek text, Paul uses a very specific word: ἀγάπη (agapē)—and he repeats it throughout the chapter:  In other words, 1 Corinthians 13 is not a poem about romance or temperament; it is Paul’s Spirit-inspired description of a distinctly Christian love—agapē love.

Scripture does not leave agapē as a vague theological term. You won’t find it necessary for commentators to debate the concept in long thesis or position papers.

God was deliberate to make sure we understand the word. To make it plain,  God not only defines it in passages like I Corinthians 13, but most significantly, He personally demonstrated it: John picks up this narrative in his short letter:  “In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world” (1 John 4:9). And again: “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” (1 John 4:10) Paul’s words echo the same theme:  “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8).

*Agapē love is not prompted by how lovely the object is—it is driven by how holy the Lover is. That is agapē: love that moves first, love that gives, love that acts solely for the good of someone else–most often the undeserving.

*Agape is not a feeling one has; it is an act one does.

Back to John’s short letter:  “Hereby perceive we the love of God, because He laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.” (1 John 3:16) Then, he makes it unavoidably practical: “Let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.” (1 John 3:18) So agapē is not sentimental. It is active, costly, and visible—love that absorbs wrongs and still chooses righteousness.

II. SUFFERS

And then there is this word… one most commonly translated in English Bibles as “patient.”

The English translators took a verb-the operative Greek word “makrothymei” and rendered it “patient”- an adjective. An adjective is a word that describes a place, person, thing. As a result, most English translations render it as what love “is” “love is patient.” ;

But “makrothymei” is really a verb- an action word. If we interpret it more closely, the word would convey an active idea- what love “does”. So, what is it love does? I think the NKJV captures it best: “love suffers long”.

That is very different from “love is patient.”

If you are like me, the word “patient” conjures up images of being nice while sitting in traffic or waiting at a doctor’s office. Patience is not being annoyed at how long it takes a package to come to my door or a pizza to my table. It was the instruction of my elementary school teachers to: “wait quietly.”

Instead, the first thing Paul would have us know is “love suffers…”

To be honest, when I read these words from Paul “love suffers…” I want to respond, “Not a good move Paul.  C’mon man,- you’re always writing these laboriously unending sentences about bewildering concepts. And now… we finally get to something that we understand and makes us feel good and you are going to lead the discussion with “love suffers”…?

But the truth is, to apply “wait quietly” imagery to this text leads to a wholesale underestimation of the profound capabilities of Agape.  Paul is describing a spectacular ability of Agape far beyond “wait quietly.”

Paul wants us to know that Agape can pull off a feat so grand, so impossible, so mind-blowing, it can only be attributable to super-human power.

But first you MUST know… “love suffers”.

Why does Paul talk about suffering?

To understand why Paul discusses suffering, you must come with me to Corinth — because context changes everything.

Corinth was a powerful, wealthy, cosmopolitan city — a crossroads of commerce and culture. People came there to get ahead, to build a name, to win status. And when the gospel reached Corinth, it saved real people who were living in that world of self-centeredness — but it didn’t instantly erase the habits the world had carved into them.

A church full of these people wasn’t merely “imperfect.” It was fractured. It was broken.

Paul says right at the start: “I hear there are divisions among you” (1 Corinthians 1:10–12). They were forming factions — “I’m of Paul,” “I’m of Apollos,” “I’m of Cephas.” In other words: they were turning the church into a status competition. Even spiritual leadership became a trophy.

It gets more painful. Paul confronts serious sin that the church was tolerating (1 Corinthians 5). He rebukes them because believers were taking one another to court (1 Corinthians 6).  He corrects them for using Christian liberty in ways that wounded weaker brothers (1 Corinthians 8–10). And even at the Lord’s Table — the very meal that proclaims unity in Christ — Paul says some were humiliating others (1 Corinthians 11). The church that gathered around the cross was cutting each other with their words, their freedoms, and their selfishness.

Why would Paul begin “love suffers”? Because the church of Corinth was on the verge of imploding; he wanted them to stay in relationship when they were wronged, insulted, disappointed, misunderstood, and provoked.

It is wise to recognize that it is a fact that all of us have a sin nature. And all of us live in a very broken world. We are fallen people in a broken world. If we choose to love fallen people in a broken world, all will not go well. KNOW THIS: Anyone who chooses to love fallen people in a broken world will suffer injury—repeated injury.

In fact, the only One who ever loved perfectly suffered greatly.

And let’s not make light of it; sometimes it isn’t just discomfort or a temporary sting, it can bring real “suffering.” The very benefactors of our affections will cause genuine and deep hurt.  Parents, children, spouse, friends, even fellow church members.  Remember, what we read here was written specifically to Christians within the context of a church.

In all of those loving relationships, there will be injury and suffering. A word thoughtlessly spoken, a generous and sacrificial act gone unappreciated, and probably worse.

That’s exactly what happens in a broken world full of fallen people— in a real church, in real friendships, in real-to-life families.

In a broken world full of fallen people, love and suffering are companions.

I don’t like saying this anymore than I enjoy reading it from Paul. But—this is an important message. It is not recounted to depress you, but to prepare you.

Knowing love suffers dispels the notion that it isn’t love unless it “feels right.” It removes the shock when someone we love mistreats us; it enables us to be prepared to respond with Agape when the blows come. It is so important a message Scripture puts it FIRST in the things we should know about love. It suffers.

Now all love suffers. But how Agape love responds is what sets it apart- it ENDURES or as the Greek would say it “suffers…LONG”

III. LONG–LOVE ENDURES

Remember, chapter 13 is not floating out in the air. Paul intentionally discusses this subject between two chapters on spiritual gifts: 1 Corinthians 12 and 14. The Corinthians were given spiritual gifts; as all believers are — but they were immature. They were impressed with what was spectacular, what was powerful, what was public. They were obsessed with gifts that looked impressive.

Look at the end of chapter 12, verse (29-31). Paul rehearses the gifts that are displayed in public, apostleship, teaching and miracle-working. He then says at the end of chapter 12: “ And I show you a more excellent way” (1 Corinthians 12:31). Or as the NLT says it: “ But now let me show you a way of life that is best of all.”

What is the way of life that is “best of all”? Scripture tells us it is a love that suffers long:
“Love suffers long…” (1 Corinthians 13:4, KJV)

June 28, 1776. For hours the British guns poured over a thousand rounds into the fort. But, to everyone’s bewilderment, the tiny fort held together. One eyewitness observed the fort to be “scarcely injured.” A letter written by a British surgeon after the battle said “ I can scarcely believe what I saw on that day; one would have imagined that no battery could have resisted the incessant fire.” But resist it did.

The sought-after hardwoods would have splintered. But the spongy palmetto logs that looked frail had simply absorbed-soaked up- the heavy blows of each broadside.

All love suffers- But Agape is like those palmetto trees- it “suffers long”- ENDURES.   It absorbs wrongs like that tiny fort and just keeps loving.

We could say, “Agape can take a punch.”

As Jonathan Edwards said, “He that exercises a Christian long-suffering toward his neighbor will bear the injuries received from him without revenge or retaliating, either by injurious deeds or bitter words.”

Peter puts this succinctly: “Love covers a multitude of sins.” – I Peter 4:8

Agape love is not demonstrated on our best day — but when we are injured. When our motives are questioned. When our sacrifice goes unnoticed. When someone speaks harshly or says something untrue.  When a brother or sister disappoints again… and again… and again.

Those things were happening  in the church, friendships and families in Corinth. And that that is the story of every church, every friendship, and every family.

Paul says, the best way of life is a love that suffers long—endures. It is a love that survives in real life, a love that is engineered for relationships where wrongs happen, and where, by God’s grace, we choose to keep loving anyway. It is love not fashioned delicately for display, but built to survive the spiritual battlefield.

And notice how Paul develops this in the following verses:
He says Agape is not easily provoked — and it “thinketh no evil” (1 Corinthians 13:5, KJV). In other words, Agape gives the benefit of the doubt— it is not living with suspicion.  It does not go about with fists clenched, keeping a ledger of wrongs, collecting evidence, building a case, or nursing resentment. Agape doesn’t become vengeful. Agape doesn’t become bitter. Agape doesn’t act cool toward others.

So, when you read in the Hallmark card, “Love is patient” don’t picture a person quietly waiting in a doctor’s office. Picture the church at Corinth — a community of redeemed sinners learning how to live together without destroying each other. Picture ordinary believers learning how to respond when the very people they are commanded to love become the source of their pain.

Isn’t that exactly how you want, even terribly need, God to love you? With a long-suffering, never-ending, never-fading, forgiving kind of love? Isn’t it true that you- again and again- have been difficult to love? Isn’t it true that you have given Him every reason to cease loving you?

Aren’t you thankful:

When God choose to reveal Himself to Moses, God declared Himself to be “compassionate, gracious, slow to anger…” (Exodus 34)

Can’t you rejoice with David and say:

“The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness…He has not dealt with us according to our sins, nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.” (Psalm 103)

Don’t you worship with Peter who reminds us:

“God is long-suffering toward us, not willing that any should perish” II Peter 3:9

Aren’t you a witness to the words of the prophet Jeremiah:

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning, Great is His faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

DON’T WE DESPERATELY NEED GOD TO LOVE US LIKE THAT?!  

Reading those words changes my perspective- it causes me to rejoice that “love suffers long”!  I MUST BE LOVED LIKE THAT OR I WILL NOT BE LOVED AT ALL.

But it goes against everything within us to love others this way. It causes us to ask, “how can I do that?”

IV. HOW CAN I DO THIS?

Paul’s audience would have asked the same question- they would be more perplexed than we are. Paul’s definition of love to his Greek audience at Corinth was embarrassing and counter-cultural. In Paul’s day it was dishonorable and even shameful to tolerate a wrong.

John MacArthur writes: “In the Greek world, self-sacrificing love and non- avenging patience were considered weakness unworthy of a noble man or woman. Aristotle, for example, taught that the great Greek virtue was refusal to tolerate insult or injury and to strike back. Vengeance was the virtue.”

Scripture gives guidance we need:

1. By Remembering

Remember the suffering you have caused: To love like this Scripture suggests we consider our own offenses: “…bearing with one another…as the Lord has forgiven you so you must also forgive…” (Colossians 3:12-13)

John Edwards said: “They that love God as they ought will have such a sense of His wonderful long-suffering toward them under the many injuries they have offered to Him that it will seem but a small thing to bear with the injuries that have been offered to them by their fellowman. All the injuries they have ever received from others in comparison with those they have offered to God will appear less than a few pence in comparison with ten thousand talents.”

Edwards’ words call to mind the story of Christ who told of a servant forgiven a vast sum – yet was unwilling to forgive a fellow-servant a small amount. (Matthew 18)

When enduring an offense we do well to remember the truth that we have offended a holy God and have been forgiven much.

B. By Supernatural Sourcing

Love that suffers long isn’t intended to come from us. It isn’t a product of our discipline, being tough, or resolute. It is a byproduct of a relationship with Christ. It is the fruit of abiding in Christ as described in John 15 or  Romans 5:5.  “The love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the H.S. Who is given to us…”

Love is a fruit of the spirit working in us. (Galatians 5:22)

CONCLUSION:

Moses stood before a burning bush. What captured his attention was that the bush was not consumed in the fire.

The palmetto tree gained attention because it withstood an incredible barrage; beyond anyone’s expectation. For that, it became our state tree and adorns our flag.

Agape suffers long- This one attribute of agape love so radically defies logic it arrests the attention of anyone who sees it. Love built for the battlefield of real life; love that absorbs the blow and keeps on loving.

Let’s hear afresh the words of Jesus: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love (agapate) one another; Just have I have loved (egapesa) you, you also are to love (agapate) one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples if you have love (agapen) for one another.”  – John 13:34-35